


In which Howl’s Moving Castle is full of those Relatable Millennial Feels

by DwarvenBeardSpores



Category: Howl Series - Diana Wynne Jones, Howl's Moving Castle - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, List
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-15
Updated: 2018-12-15
Packaged: 2019-09-18 13:58:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16996317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DwarvenBeardSpores/pseuds/DwarvenBeardSpores
Summary: What it says on the tin: relatable truths in list form.Also my most popular tumblr post, crossposted here for posterity and accessibility.





	In which Howl’s Moving Castle is full of those Relatable Millennial Feels

**Author's Note:**

> If you'd like to reblog the tumblr version, it can be found here: https://dwarven-beard-spores.tumblr.com/post/168990453881/in-which-howls-moving-castle-is-full-of-those
> 
> Also if I decide to go back through my stuff and archive any other hmc text posts they might end up being later chapters of this? idk, we'll see.

**Sophie  
**

  * Convinced she’s fated to be a failure by pervasive societal messages
  * Depressed and anxious to the point that leaving the house terrifies her
  * Constant excuses to not talk to people
  * Wears one color and it is grey (like her soul)
  * “I’m eighteen but I’m ninety at heart”
  * RAGE
  * Has to get away from her home so she moves into a terrifying moving castle bc it’s free and at this point why not
  * *everything’s on fire* “This is fine”
  * I KNOW EXACTLY HOW THE WORLD WORKS o wait shit fuck
  * Feelings? What are those? I only know cleaning.



**Howl**

  * Fancy degree that he has to move to another world to use
  * Loves his blood family but just… can’t be around them 
  * “Why don’t you have a real job”
  * Cannot handle responsibility
  * Is responsible for things anyway
  * “Howl we have no money” “I’m going to buy a skull”
  * Embodiment of Do It For The Aesthetic ™
  * also “treat yo self” 
  * Just Can’t anymore and has a meltdown over his hair (aka everything else in his life)
  * “Oh no I care for all these people why”
  * Overcharges rich people and undercharges poor people bc the system sucks
  * Last night on earth? Time to get wasted.
  * “I don’t care” he says caringly, while caring deeply.



**Michael**

  * Anxious bab
  * What is happening why this plz help
  * Stresses out over his homework only to find out the papers had gotten mixed up and he was doing the wrong thing
  * “I guess this now” :/
  * Better at adulting than the actual adults
  * Loves his gf so much and is so openly happy about it
  * A bit useless in a crisis
  * Tries so hard, gets so far
  * Found family is the best family



**Calcifer**

  * “I’m being exploited!”
  * Complains about everything
  * Bored. Just. So bored. Give him attention.
  * Used to be literal star but things went wrong and now he’s living in a fireplace
  * Eats everything and anything. 
  * “Guys I have arms be impressed by my arms”
  * Creates a castle for the Aesthetic that also looks like it’s about to fall apart and frightens people.
  * Oops he cares about these assholes now time to ride or die for them 



**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> I can also be found on tumblr as dwarven-beard-spores, and twitter and dreamwidth as dwarvenbeardspores.


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